The only light in a dark world...

My page is too pink, I think. Seems like I've got a pink kink in my think. I'll fix the stink of this link in a wink.

Have you read The City of Ember by Jeanne Duprau? What a lovely story! I guess technically, I haven't read it either- but I listened to it while driving through LA. It calmed me. It's the story of Lina and Doon, two twelve-year-olds who live in an underground city built 200 years ago. Here's the Amazon.com synopsis if you're interested:

It is always night in the city of Ember. But there is no moon, no stars. The only light during the regular twelve hours of "day" comes from floodlamps that cast a yellowish glow over the streets of the city. Beyond are the pitch-black Unknown Regions, which no one has ever explored because an understanding of fire and electricity has been lost, and with it the idea of a Moveable Light. "Besides," they tell each other, "there is nowhere but here" Among the many other things the people of Ember have forgotten is their past and a direction for their future. For 250 years they have lived pleasantly, because there has been plenty of everything in the vast storerooms. But now there are more and more empty shelves--and more and more times when the lights flicker and go out, leaving them in terrifying blackness for long minutes. What will happen when the generator finally fails?

Anyways, the reason I bring this up- is because I am now reading it aloud to the two monsters that I am a part time nanny for. They love it as much as I did. Observe the monsters:


Don't they look diabolical? I love reading to kids. I'm already starting a list in my head of all the books I want to read to my punks. The City of Ember has made the list.

In other news, today my darlin' is goin' fishin'. I was supposed to go too, but making money is taking precedence. Hopefull, he'll bring me home a seabass and we'll have some surf n' turf for dinner.

Have a wonderful and lovely Valentine's day!

Early nights and late mornings.

Someday soon- possibly tonight- I will change my heading. I know it is still winter but recently it's been feeling like spring. Hence the lime green sweater I am wearing at the moment.

The Superbowl was yesterday. It's definitely a holiday around my apartment, so we treated it as such. I made Jalapeno Poppers (sorry- couldn't figure out how to html a tilde), BBQ Chicken Potato Skins, and homemade salsa. And by the time the game was over, I had headache and stomachache from eating too much "bad for me" food, so I crawled into bed around 8:30 with the intention of working on my knitting. But I promptly passed out instead.

And now, I am going to steal my sister's style and make a list.

Qualities of my dream home:

...In the middle of nowhere

...Solar panels

...A windmill

...A movie theatre

...A sauna

...A big garden where I can grow all my own vegetables

...A gardener to make sure I don't kill all my vegetables

...A porch and a porch swing

...Nice view with nobody in sight

...A lake with a dock

...A Newfoundland

...Sang, the sushi chef

...Bay window

...More storage than I know what to do with

...River rock flooring with radiant heat

BBQ Chicken Potato Skins Recipe

Baked Russet Potatoes

A rotisserie chicken

Bar-B-Que Sauce

Shredded mozzarella cheese

While the potatoes are baking, cut up the rotesserie chicken, discarding the skin and breaking the pieces into inch-long shreds. Take the baked potatoes and cut them in half, scoop out the middle of each half until you are left with the desired thickness. My boyfriend likes less potato so I usually only leave about a centimeter of potato. Save the left over potato for mashed potatoes or other goodies. Fill each skin with chicken, a tablespoon or so of BBQ sauce, and top with mozzarella. Bake at 425 degrees F for 10 minutes. Serve with ranch dipping sauce and extra BBQ sauce.

This morning, I loved my apartment. And that doesn't happen often. Please note our hanging stuffed dragon in the corner. His name is Zeke and we won him in Vegas. Also, please notice my extremely large, extremely awesome diva hat on the wall.

I love it. Also...

I love him.

ALSO- I love that I lost 10 pounds! All day long I had this going through my head: "Jacqueline! You just lost ten pounds! What are you going to do next??!" "Uh- lose another ten?"

Picture this, if you will...

You're in a wonderful relationship and about to start getting your Master's degree. Then BAM! someone offers you an interview for a job six hours away. Now if this had happened eight months ago, it would've been perfect. But you had already settled on a decision to finish school and grew to really appreciate it. Look forward to it, even. Now let's consider the options.

A) You blow off the interview

B) You accept the interview and get the job

C) You accept the interview and don't get the job

D) You hide under the blankets and attempt to break the world record for the longest nap.

Here's how the options will play out.

Option A. You will feel bad for closing the door to a possible contact and like an overall lazy person who is scared to death of change.

Option B. You will have to have a seriously long talk with your boyfriend. Is it worth it for him to quit his job and move with you? Can he get a job down there? Do you even want to live down there? Would you prefer to live closer to your loved ones? Is the salary worth putting your Master's on hold? Pretty much Option B opens up a disgusting amount of Yes or No questions that I, I mean, you really don't want to answer.

Option C. Rejection sucks. One more "No, thank you" might plummet you into the pit of despair with no hopes of return. You won't want to go get your Master's. You won't want to work on your relationship. You won't want to go to work. And your world will fall apart. (Ok- maybe that's the worst case scenario).

Option D. Where's bad?

My thoughts on the matter...

I try to avoid getting personal on the web- bad things tend to happen when you do that.

But here I go anyway, sharing my thoughts on the matter. And the matter is... marriage.

"Mawwiage. Mawwiage is what bwings us togetha today."

It's taken me a long time to realize that the "relationships are work" sentiment wasn't just a saying. I had a similarly hard time accepting the "freshman fifteen" sentiment. Much to my chagrin, I realized that love was not all rainbows and skipping through wheat fields like movies and country songs and country movies led me to believe. There was a moment of horror. Of self doubt. Of disappointment. And then my trademark optimism peaked through. Love, and the commitment of love (aka marriage) is not a fantasy nor a fairy tale. And it shouldn't be. Fantasies fade. Marriage is a decision. A decision that two people make because they love each other and are willing to sacrifice certain things (not ALL things) to live a shared life. There's no guarantee that you'll be outrageously happy the whole time, which would be pretty boring in my opinion, but that's why they say "for better or worse." But if both of you work to keep each other happy, the operative words being "both of you" and "work," then you will stay in love and cherish the life you made together.

And another thing! The whole "We're soulmates, we can spend every moment together and not get sick of each other!" That's just crazy talk! Do you really think that's going to always be the case? If it is- great! If not, even better. Alone time, family time, friend time, dog time, kids time. Those times shape you- and you do not want to lose yourself in a relationship.

My wish is that you all find someone who makes you laugh, understands your neurosis, makes sacrifices for you, and realizes that life will not always be perfect- but they will wade through the muck with you, holding hands.

Look it, look it, look it!!

My first wristlet! 1/2 of Jessi's graduation present. The other 1/2 is in pre-production.

Jessi and Jackie

I was supposed to be spending quality time with my boyfriend right now (according to the obscure schedule in my head) but he's playing Call of Duty- and frankly, I've met my quota on hearing gunshots for the day. So I shall sit here and eat my brie cheese on a cracker while I fantasize about a life that doesn't so closely resemble Hell. Just kidding- name that movie!

Jessi is coming to visit this weekend!! Horray!! We will make cakes, drink wine, watch Dexter (because her boyfriend doesn't let her- she has nightmares), eat massive amounts of clam chowder, go to Avila Valley Barn, drink in the green hills of the central coast, go esplorin', visit/bug our crazy friend Ida, annoy my honey-pookie-pie, she'll try to catch a seagull (I'll tell her they have diseases and she shouldn't feed them), and we'll be all around merry! Like Dean and Jerry. Mario and Luigi. Rocky and Bullwinkle. Calvin and Hobbes. I'm Hobbes- obviously.

Yup. Like peas and carrots.